May 29th, 2011 – Change for Equality: Coinciding with her birthday, the website Equality for Change is publishing a letter that Nasrin Sotoudeh, incarcerated human right’s lawyer wrote to her 3 year old son Nima right before their face to face meeting last week.
The content of Sotoudeh’s letter to her son Nima is as follows:
Hello my dearest Nima,
They took the diary I had written for you when they raided our house. After a one week hunger strike, I was finally able to recover some of the personal belongings of you and your sister, but unfortunately since my arrest, I had not had the opportunity my dearest son to write in your diary. Now that I have been transferred to the general ward [at Evin] and have access to pen and paper, I have decided to once again fill the pages of your diary.
Will an iota of the violated rights of my two children and the rights of so many other mothers who have endured imprisonment, ever be compensated for?
My dearest, I have been behind bars for approximately nine months now. During this time, when ever the opportunity arose for us to briefly meet face to face, you seemed so happy. Your sweet chatter hardly gave your sister a chance to say a word and I found myself turning my gaze back and forth to listen to you speak. I recall how excited you were every time I bought you a chocolate. What you feared most were the visitations from behind a cabin window. Ever since my transfer to the general ward, we have had three such visitations; after each visitation, you have left distraught. When our visitation time ends and the curtain comes down, you panic and begin screaming. I understand your manly pride. Although feminist wish to deny a man’s pride, I saw how this time you stood a little farther away, folding your arms, standing sideways, glancing at me through the corner of your eyes as though you were angry. All the female political prisoners present on that day noticed your pride, saying that you paid no attention to them. They don’t know you like I do. They don’t know the degree of your sweet nature. You were just overwhelmed, because it has been a few weeks since we’had last had the opportunity to meet face to face and in person.
I am knitting you a large clown doll. It is my motherly love that constantly draws me to your doll every time I have a moment to spare.I am knitting you a rather large clown doll. Though it takes over my study time, it is my motherly love that constantly draws me to your doll every time I have a moment to spare. I’m a little worried about how it will turn out, but hope that you will like it.
It is the hope that my children and the children of my beloved land will someday experience better days that helps me endure these difficult days of separation from you, your sister and your father. I have nevertheless asked myself over and over again whether any of my dreams will ever become a reality. I have asked myself whether an iota of the violated rights of my children and the rights of so many other mothers who have endured imprisonment, will ever be compensated for. Of course every mother endures prison with this hope.